Don’t Let A Bad Experience Keep You From Going Back To Church

Trauma can come into our lives in many ways. Trauma can come in many forms, including a car accident, witnessing domestic violence, and even being lost as a child. These circumstances can cause brain damage and upset emotions. Many of these situations require treatment and processing. With the right actions taken, we can overcome trauma and make healthy decisions for our lives in the future — and, indeed, we should.

Religious trauma is no different. Some Christian women have been subject to the trauma of spiritual abuse and ended up leaving church. But it doesn’t have to be this way, and it isn’t healthy for them to live with such untended pain in their hearts.

The decline in church attendance in the U.S. is a long-standing trend, but the exodus of women from the U.S. has been faster than ever. One of the reasons for leaving is often church hurt. This is often a negative experience or a traumatic event in a particular faith.

While there are many examples of church leadership that has caused harm, the methods for overcoming these hurts are not well-known. These experiences must be viewed through a psychological lens in order to heal and grow.

When a friend of mine was a psychotherapist, I was amazed by the concept. It’s the idea of schema. Simply put: “a schema is a cognitive framework or concept that helps organize and interpret information.” This can be a powerful mental tool, as it allows people to quickly scan through huge amounts of brain data. However, it can also be dangerous when it comes down to trauma events. That’s why it’s so important to identify when it’s at play.

As shortcuts, mental frameworks can easily exclude important and new information. Because we rely so heavily on schemas, it is extremely difficult to retain new information about subjects we are familiar with, those things that don’t conform to what we Think We know. We can therefore naturally return to our preexisting beliefs and realities, even if they no longer exist or are relevant.

When negative past experiences are reliving in our minds, it can make a big difference in how we see church. It can be difficult for those who have been hurt by faith-based messages or within church walls to change their negative thinking patterns. One negative memory linked to a faith experience can wholly taint one’s perspective of faith and church.

This is how it works: A woman who has been physically abused by her father might be afraid that all men are violent. She may turn her back on men and refuse to be in a relationship with them because she believes all men are abusive and bad.

This type of thinking can arise in any situation that has resulted in something negative. People can believe if they have been subject to unbiblical judgement or undeserved shame in their past.