{"id":1739840,"date":"2022-11-15T13:01:40","date_gmt":"2022-11-15T18:01:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/?p=1739840"},"modified":"2022-11-15T13:34:41","modified_gmt":"2022-11-15T18:34:41","slug":"6-reasons-its-always-a-mistake-to-think-of-yourself-as-a-victim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/6-reasons-its-always-a-mistake-to-think-of-yourself-as-a-victim\/","title":{"rendered":"6 Reasons It\u2019s Always a Mistake to Think of Yourself as a Victim"},"content":{"rendered":"<aside class=\"mashsb-container mashsb-main mashsb-stretched\"><div class=\"mashsb-box\"><div class=\"mashsb-count mash-medium\" style=\"&quot;\"><div class=\"counts mashsbcount\">26<\/div><span class=\"mashsb-sharetext\">SHARES<\/span><\/div><div class=\"mashsb-buttons\"><a class=\"mashicon-facebook mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.conservativenewsdaily.net%2Fbreaking-news%2F6-reasons-its-always-a-mistake-to-think-of-yourself-as-a-victim%2F\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-twitter mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=&amp;url=https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/?p=1739840&amp;via=ConservNewsDly\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Twitter<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-subscribe mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"#\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Subscribe<\/span><\/a><div class=\"onoffswitch2 mash-medium mashsb-noshadow\" style=\"display:none\"><\/div><\/div>\n            <\/div>\n                <div style=\"clear:both\"><\/div><\/aside>\n            <!-- Share buttons by mashshare.net - Version: 4.0.47--><p>Sociologists Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning came up with a useful way of explaining how America\u2019s culture has changed over the decades. Essentially, they believe we initially changed from a culture that revolved around honor to one that revolved around dignity. Now, we\u2019re in the process of becoming a victim-centered culture. Here\u2019s a short, but sweet explainer of the differences.<\/p>\n<p><span>An <\/span><strong>honor culture<\/strong><span> revolves around the idea of being strong, brave, tough, and unwilling to accept even small insults to your good name. You still see a lot of this sort of culture in the Arab world and perhaps ironically, it shows through in the culture around rap music as well. The notorious Hatfield vs. McCoy feud and dueling fit into this sort of mindset very well.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>On the other hand, a <\/span><strong>dignity culture<\/strong><span> expects people to be civilized, not particularly sensitive to slights, and to possess a sense of their own self-worth that is bigger than a petty insult. Being quick to violence, insult, or complain is looked down upon. Think of Frederick Douglass saying, \u201cA gentleman will not insult me, and no man not a gentleman can insult me\u201d or \u201csticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me\u201d and you start to get a sense of it. If there\u2019s a dispute, then it should ideally be talked out and if that\u2019s not possible or it\u2019s too severe for that, let the \u201cauthorities\u201d handle it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Today, America seems to be moving towards a <\/span><strong>victim culture<\/strong><span>, which borrows the sensitivity to the slights of the honor culture without any of the virtues that went along with it. It also borrows the willingness to go to the authorities of a dignity culture, without the restraint or willingness to work through problems that are part of it. In other words, it\u2019s cowardly, weak, soft people getting offended and immediately running to the \u201cauthorities\u201d and asking them to fix their hurt feelings. It\u2019s essentially the same dynamic as a small boy crying to his mom after his bigger brother does something to him. In a victim-centered culture, he who is perceived as the weakest, most aggrieved, outraged, and victimized \u201cwins.\u201d Think about the sort of people who claim to be upset by microaggressions, cultural appropriation or that claim \u201cwords are violence\u201d and you will get the general idea.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>There are a multitude of problems with embracing victimhood, but as you are about to see, one of the biggest is that there are very few people who think of themselves as victims that end up having a good life. After you read this, you will understand why that\u2019s the case.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1) It stops you from fixing your problems:<\/strong><span> One of the biggest advantages of taking full responsibility for your own life is that you always know exactly who has to fix what\u2019s going wrong. It\u2019s that person you look at in the mirror every morning when you get up. On the other hand, if you attribute all your problems to \u201csociety\u201d or some \u201cism,\u201d you have a very big problem because those are mostly out of your control.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Changing yourself can literally happen in a single moment of decision, but changing the world is an extraordinarily difficult, unpredictable process that may take decades or lifetimes if it ever happens at all. If you\u2019re only going to be happy when you decide that \u201cracism no longer exists,\u201d straight men like transwomen,\u201d or the imaginary \u201cpatriarchy stops repressing me,\u201d you\u2019re going to spend your whole life waiting.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2) It spurs you to create oppressors:<\/strong><span> If you have to be a victim, then you need to come up with someone or something that\u2019s victimizing. Maybe it\u2019s \u201cstructural racism,\u201d \u201cTrump fans\u201d or \u201cChristians.\u201d Why, if it wasn\u2019t for those people, life would be great!<\/span><\/p>\n<div class=\"captioned-image-container\">\n<figure><a class=\"image-link is-viewable-img image2\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/substackcdn.com\/image\/fetch\/f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep\/https%3A%2F%2Fbucketeer-e05bbc84-baa3-437e-9518-adb32be77984.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd0155e08-548d-4087-bfe3-6fd95dcf8840_586x496.jpeg\" rel=\"noopener\"><\/p>\n<div class=\"image2-inset\"><source type=\"image\/webp\" \/><img src width=\"586\" height=\"496\" data-attrs=\"{\" \/><\/div>\n<p><\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n<p>Except, the reality is that there is no conspiracy to keep you down because very few of us are that important. White people aren\u2019t secretly conspiring to keep minorities poor. The Jews aren\u2019t looking to get you. There isn\u2019t actually a patriarchy plotting to keep women down. On the contrary, the world is full of human beings ruthlessly pursuing their own interests and unless they\u2019re given a reason to, they don\u2019t care enough about you, me, or somebody with a victim complex to put time and energy into keeping us down.<\/p>\n<p>Still, even victims need to feel like the heroes of their own stories in their minds, so they invent oppressors. This is why places like Twitter are full of angry failures railing against things other people are supposedly thinking or doing that have no basis in reality. At the end of the day, isn\u2019t life already hard enough without creating millions of imaginary enemies in your mind that are conspiring to keep you down?<\/p>\n<p><strong>3) It traps you in a cycle of failure:<\/strong><span> Victim culture is essentially one big oppression Olympics. It encourages you to actually COMPETE WITH EACH other to be the biggest victim.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u201cMaybe a CIS, white woman like you shouldn\u2019t be talking about oppression. What do you know about it compared to someone gay like me?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt must be so hard (snicker) being gay for a WHITE MAN like you. Try being Latino in America sometime, buddy!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cTry being a black trans woman if you think that\u2019s tough! Did I mention I was misgendered this morning? But, no, no, tell me how bad you have it!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This may not be exactly the way the conversation goes, but this dynamic plays out millions of times per day in the real world and on social media these days. It puts people under never-ending pressure to find a way to claim to be the most oppressed, the most put-upon, the most victimized person \u2013 and you know what? You get what you look for in life. I promise you, if you try to spot as many red cars as possible on your way to work tomorrow morning, you know what\u2019s going to happen? You\u2019re going to see a lot more red cars than normal. Know what you\u2019re not going to remember after the trip is over? How many blue cars you passed because that\u2019s not what you\u2019re looking for.<\/p>\n<p>If you spend your whole life obsessively trying to find ways to make people pity you, you will get really good at finding them, but you know what you won\u2019t find? Success, happiness, and reasons to succeed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sociologists Bradley Campbell and Jason Manning came up with a useful way of explaining how America\u2019s culture has changed over the decades. Essentially, they believe we initially changed from a<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1739843,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","fifu_image_url":"https:\/\/cndimages.nyc3.digitaloceanspaces.com\/breaking-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/01\/IMG_2758-scaled-1.jpg","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[547],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1739840","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-the-bongino-report"],"fifu_image_url":"https:\/\/cndimages.nyc3.digitaloceanspaces.com\/breaking-news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/01\/IMG_2758-scaled-1.jpg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1739840","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1739840"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1739840\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1739843"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1739840"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1739840"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1739840"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}