{"id":1466886,"date":"2022-05-06T15:44:48","date_gmt":"2022-05-06T19:44:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/?p=1466886"},"modified":"2022-05-06T15:44:51","modified_gmt":"2022-05-06T19:44:51","slug":"cursing-motherhood-how-toxic-mommy-culture-is-hurting-our-children","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/cursing-motherhood-how-toxic-mommy-culture-is-hurting-our-children\/","title":{"rendered":"Cursing Motherhood: How \u2018Toxic Mommy Culture\u2019 Is Hurting Our Children"},"content":{"rendered":"<aside class=\"mashsb-container mashsb-main mashsb-stretched\"><div class=\"mashsb-box\"><div class=\"mashsb-count mash-medium\" style=\"&quot;\"><div class=\"counts mashsbcount\">20<\/div><span class=\"mashsb-sharetext\">SHARES<\/span><\/div><div class=\"mashsb-buttons\"><a class=\"mashicon-facebook mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.conservativenewsdaily.net%2Fbreaking-news%2Fcursing-motherhood-how-toxic-mommy-culture-is-hurting-our-children%2F\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-twitter mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=&amp;url=https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/?p=1466886&amp;via=ConservNewsDly\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Twitter<\/span><\/a><a class=\"mashicon-subscribe mash-medium mash-nomargin mashsb-noshadow\" href=\"#\" target=\"_top\" rel=\"nofollow\"><span class=\"icon\"><\/span><span class=\"text\">Subscribe<\/span><\/a><div class=\"onoffswitch2 mash-medium mashsb-noshadow\" style=\"display:none\"><\/div><\/div>\n            <\/div>\n                <div style=\"clear:both\"><\/div><\/aside>\n            <!-- Share buttons by mashshare.net - Version: 4.0.47--><div><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/dw-wp-production.imgix.net\/2022\/05\/Culture.jpg?w=1200&#038;h=800&#038;ixlib=react-9.3.0\" class=\"ff-og-image-inserted\" alt=\"image\" \/><\/div>\n<p><span>A TikTok video of a mom serving her young child curse words on a platter \u2014 literally \u2014 <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.newsweek.com\/moms-rude-message-toddler-sparks-online-debate-1682692\"><span>went viral<\/span><\/a><span> and inspired both laughs and outrage in February.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>User @emma_moonbeam earned 5.5 million likes on the short clip of her serving a toddler alphabet potato shapes that spell out \u201cU p*** me off\u201d while the child, who is too young to read, claps with glee.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cLove her really,\u201d the caption reads. Many followers were not convinced.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>It would be bad enough if this was a one-off incident of a mom making a truly terrible decision. However, a similar clip circulated the following month. A mom using the handle @its_liloandme pulled the same stunt with her young daughter, serving potato letters that spelled out \u201cF*** you.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cShe hasn\u2019t been very nice to me today so enjoying the fact that she can\u2019t read,\u201d the TikTok user, who <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.the-sun.com\/lifestyle\/4941315\/mum-coded-message-daughter-good-thing-cant-read\/\"><span>The Sun<\/span><\/a><span> identified as Quiarna, captioned the clip. She also anticipated backlash on the video and said, \u201cKaren\u2019s\u2026 ASSEMBLE.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>That video \u2014 which earned more than 3 million likes with the comments notably disabled after intense backlash \u2014 has since been removed from the platform.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>These may seem like extreme examples of mothers bragging about how much they despise caring for their children. However, the TikTok videos are part of a larger trend of women treating motherhood as a duty that must be endured rather than celebrated. This may come in response to our culture\u2019s unrealistic image of being a mom and the sacrifices that that vocation requires. But now the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Podcaster Allie Beth Stuckey dubs this trend \u201ctoxic mommy culture.\u201d\u00a0 One of the most tangible examples of this, she <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/ep-577-resist-toxic-motherhood-get-your-kids-off-tiktok\/id1359249098?i=1000553216640\"><span>says<\/span><\/a><span>, is the pervasive joke that moms need a glass of wine to survive the day. Many women will even brag about this on social media to all of their friends.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Stuckey said this movement \u201cpresents motherhood as something that women are a victim of\u201d and are \u201censlaved to.\u201d These mothers will describe children as \u201cbrats and burdens.\u201d But it\u2019s hard to criticize this sort of complaining because it is usually framed as a joke.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>These videos and posts are meant to create camaraderie and commiseration among parents, who absolutely should be sharing their struggles among themselves to feel less alone. Stuckey argues that calling children terrible names, however, is a step too far.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>She also brings up the valid point that children will eventually see the clips, especially those that go viral. And she wonders how these grown kids will feel knowing their mother exploited these private moments just for laughs and clicks.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cIt contributes to a culture that sees children in general as a burden. And I think that it does contribute to the attitudes that then justify and normalize abortion,\u201d Stuckey says in her <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/ep-577-resist-toxic-motherhood-get-your-kids-off-tiktok\/id1359249098?i=1000553216640\"><span>2020 podcast episode<\/span><\/a><span> which explores this exact topic. She says the \u201cpicture being painted\u201d is that \u201cparenthood sucks,\u201d and that non-parents may use this as a reason to not have children by any means necessary. Including having abortions.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Stuckey posits that mocking motherhood contributes to abortion culture in an indirect way, portraying kids as \u201cbrats and burdens rather than the blessings that they are.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Even mainstream outlets have explored the negative effects of so-called \u201cmommy wine culture.\u201d Memes, shirts, and slogans advertising how \u201cMommy Needs Wine\u201d or \u201cIt\u2019s Mommy\u2019s Wine Time\u201d are pervasive and, again, are presented in a joking manner as a way to bond with other mothers over the stress of raising kids. But just like with swearing at toddlers, this trend can do more harm than good.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Even HuffPost <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.huffpost.com\/entry\/mom-stress-without-wine_l_621cf83be4b03d0c803cc340\"><span>admitted<\/span><\/a><span> that the wine memes can lead to serious problems for mothers who use their nightly wine as a means of stress relief.\u201cToxic mommy wine culture in a nutshell is the combination making jokes or insinuating the need for alcohol (wine in this case) to \u2018deal\u2019 with parenting and the normalization of what is often overlooked substance abuse. I am sure every mother has read a meme surrounding this idea and either laughed or felt completely validated,\u201d counselor Heather Aje told the publication.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Aje went on to explain how normalizing these behaviors could lead to alcoholism or other alcohol-related health issues, including higher blood pressure, increased anxiety, sleeplessness, and irritability.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Some media figures are addressing the lies about motherhood being an unbearable burden publicly.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cThe biggest and worst lie my generation was ever sold is that motherhood is a burden and something you could take or leave,\u201d former \u201cView\u201d co-host Meghan McCain <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/MeghanMcCain\/status\/1507016262718611459\"><span>tweeted<\/span><\/a><span>. \u201cBut nothing in my life compares to being Liberty\u2019s mom \u2014 the sheer joy, fulfillment, privilege it is. [And] I\u2019ve experienced a lot of amazing [and] surreal things.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>She\u2019s one of many celebrities who are slowly figuring out that becoming a parent is a lot less terrible than meme culture makes it out to be.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>But toxic mommy culture is getting even worse. A growing faction of parents who regret having children are sharing their stories, mostly anonymously but sometimes with their names attached, which is helping normalize and validate these types of thoughts.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>There\u2019s a 9,000 member Facebook <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/IRegretHavingChildren\/\"><span>group<\/span><\/a><span> devoted to the topic called \u201cI regret having children.\u201d In a 2017 <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.todaysparent.com\/family\/parenting\/i-regret-motherhood\/\"><span>essay<\/span><\/a><span> published in Today\u2019s Parent called \u201cRegretting motherhood: what have I done with my life?\u201d one woman envies her childless friend\u2019s seemingly perfect life on social media while comparing it to her own much less glamorous reality of raising kids.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cShe\u2019s still as skinny as she was when we were at university, and hot damn she looks good in leather pants. I\u2019m just happy if the sweats I bought at the grocery store are clean enough to get me through another day,\u201d the author writes. \u201cWhile she\u2019s sipping sparkling wine as she jets from London to New York, I\u2019m downing tepid coffee as I drive my kids to ballet and swimming lessons. Early-morning yoga class and getting an immaculate half-moon manicure? For me, being able to go to the washroom all by myself is a treat.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>\u201cThere are times, like when I look at her life and then at my own, that I find myself regretting motherhood,\u201d the author next admits before quickly reassuring the reader that she does \u201clove\u201d her children but also wishes she wasn\u2019t their mom.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>These types of admissions were once taboo. Now hearing about celebrities who deliberately chose to live child-free, either through birth control or abortion, is commonplace. Many send the message that without sacrificing motherhood, they would not have the fame and fortune they\u2019ve achieved. It goes without saying that they consider the money much more appealing than raising kids.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>Ultimately, the narcissism of our broader culture is the main reason why toxic mommy culture exists. Motherhood is a gift, but it is also a sacrifice of the highest order. It requires continual self-denial for the sake of another person and often this happens with little or no recognition from the child or society at large. It is one of the most enormous challenges a woman can take on.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span>But as most mothers will tell you, it\u2019s also the most fulfilling, extraordinary, beautiful, and important work a woman can do. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><i>The views expressed in this opinion piece are the author\u2019s own and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A TikTok video of a mom serving her young child curse words on a platter \u2014 literally \u2014 went viral and inspired both laughs and outrage in February.\u00a0User @emma_moonbeam earned<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":345,"featured_media":1481918,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mo_disable_npp":"","fifu_image_url":"","fifu_image_alt":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1466886","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1466886","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/345"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1466886"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1466886\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1481918"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1466886"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1466886"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.conservativenewsdaily.net\/breaking-news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1466886"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}